Baby Showers 101: Etiquette

Being aware of etiquette helps the hostess of a baby shower ensure her event is a success for the expectant mother and guests. While many of the formal practices observed in the past have been relaxed, many of the traditional rules of etiquette have survived for a very good reason: they take the guesswork out of planning the shower and help set everyone’s expectations!

Invitations – Setting the Tone of the Shower

When should baby shower invitations be sent out? They should reach guests two to three weeks in advance to allow everyone ample time to 1) arrange their busy schedules, 2) hire baby sitters for their own kids, and 3) shop for presents.

Hosting – Who gets the Honor?

It’s been tradition that the honor of hosting the baby shower belonged only to friends of the pregnant mom. If a family member hosted the event, it gave the appearance of an event designed to solicit gifts for the expectant woman. Now, however, that rule has been bent to the point of breaking. Anyone can throw a baby shower to honor the mom-to-be… including the woman herself!

A word of caution, however. Hosting a baby shower takes a lot of both time and money, so no one should be put on the spot and asked to host a baby shower. The best hostess is a volunteer hostess who is willing, able, and happy to perform in this role.

Time – How Close to the Baby’s Arrival?

When’s the ideal time to hold the shower? It’s usually before the birth of the baby, in the late stages of the pregnancy. It’s usually at this time that pregnant women start feeling stressed out with worries about the delivery or their physical discomfort. So having a baby shower at this time can create just the diversion she needs to keep her spirits bright.

Seeing old friends and relatives at the shower helps emphasize the importance of the pregnancy, and while traditionally a shower was only held for the first baby, it is now considered acceptable to have baby showers for subsequent children, including adoptions.

Guest List

The guest list should be made in consultation with the expectant mother since there may be many people she would like to include whom the host doesn’t know. Although traditionally, baby showers were only for women, the mother may nowadays choose to have both men and women at her celebration. In fact, more and more baby showers are being held for both the mother and father.

Behavior

Because the reason for the shower is to celebrate the arriving baby, congratulations to the soon-to-be mom and dad are expected of every guest. And like with any part, the shower guests should also give thanks to the host for his/her work in holding and organizing the event.

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