The Real Estate Market - You Just Have to Laugh

June 19, 2008 – 7:36 am
by Hal James

Have you ever had one of those moments when things are so bleak that you just burst out laughing? The current ice cold real estate market is having that very effect on a lot of people. If you are down in the dumps, a laugh can help. Just consider the following.

If you owe the bank $100, that’s your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that’s the bank’s problem.

Definition of “potential” in real estate ads - Grim. Steer clear unless you have a lot of money and believe your blind dates really did have nice personalities. See “Ready to Rehab,” and “Fixer Upper.”

Definition of “unique downtown loft” in real estate ads - Used to be the drunk tank at the local jail.

The homeowner got into his grubbiest clothes on Saturday morning and set about all the chores he’d been putting off for weeks. He was halfway through mowing the lawn when a woman pulled up in the driveway and yelled out her window, “Say, what do you charge for yard work?” He thought for a minute, then answered, “The lady who lives here, lets me sleep with her.”

A Modern home is a place where a switch controls everything but the kids, and it has gadgets to do everything except make the payments.

Definition of “easy care yard” - The landscaping is dirt, cement and dead plants. It doesn’t get much easier than that when it comes to caring for it.

When A real-estate agency hadn’t sold our house, we decided to do it ourselves. I placed ads in the local papers, spray painted a “For Sale” message on a and posted it outside. When my husband came home, he told me, laughing, that my sign was the most truthful one he had ever seen. In my haste I had printed - “For Sale by Ower.”

The definition of Homesickness - What you feel every month when the mortgage is due.

Definition of “one of a kind” in real estate ads - Architect was a heroin addict. So ugly, the neighbors are pooling money to have it demolished!

My buyer told me that he lived in the same house for 10 years. When I checked, I found out he’d still be there today if the Governor hadn’t pardoned him.

Nature is all about cycles. Real estate is hardly natural, but it shows the same cycles. Things were red hot five years ago and will be red hot again in a few years. Just hang in there and keep a smile on your face until things come back your way!

About the Author:
Hal James writes about issues faced by people selling FSBO property for FSBOAmerica.org, where you can get a free one month listing to sell your home by owner and get more real estate tips.

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