Give Your Strategy a Makeover and Begin Attracting the Men!
March 25, 2008 – 6:42 amHuman natures allows or even enables each of us to use our intelligence to build strategies that keep each of us from suffering from the greatest of heartaches, rejections or embarrassments. Some people use strategies that include pushing, hounding, whining, pleading or even lying. Most of the time, though, these methods backfire.
Women develop strategies, as well, when it comes to attracting a man’s attention or interest. Some women are fairly good at it. Some are not. And sometimes all it does is make the man nervous and uncomfortable.
One strategy women use is bribery. This is when a woman becomes the helpful, thoughtful, nice girlfriend in order to get the guy’s interest. Thinking - wrongly - that if she proves to him how sweet and nice she is, he will become attracted to her. It usually does not work - simply because attraction, for men, does not work that way.
The second strategy women use is called CONVINCING. This is where you tell a man how you feel about him in order to try to coerce him into proclaiming the same kind of love for you. You can also do this by asking him leading questions, trying to get him to profess his love for you. More than likely - convincing him will only drive him away.
Strategy three that women adopt is to have sex with him in order to create a relationship with him. What most women do not realize is that for a man - sex does not mean you are in a relationship. Sex is sex - it’s great, he wants it, but that does not mean that you are exclusive, that he has deep feelings for you or anything other than that.
The reason women do these things is because it makes SENSE to do them. It makes perfect sense to be kind and helpful to man you want to attract. It is logical to articulate your feelings for a man, hoping to spark that confession from him as well. It also is understandable to have sex with a man, knowing what having sex means to you as a woman, when you think it would mean the same to him.
What women do not understand is that the actions do not broadcast the kind of attitude a man would find attractive. In fact, they do quite the opposite - they show him a needy, fearful and uptight kind of woman.
That is not what you were attempting to achieve with your strategy, though. Unfortunately, that is what he SEES when he looks at what you were doing. It’s not appealing, it is uninviting.
So what DOES work to attract a man? Well, one of the things that men certainly find attractive is a positive, confident and independent attitude. What this attitude will tell him is that YOU are not about to settle for just any man - you are worth his time and he better be worth yours. Your attitude can also tell him that that you will let no one control your life but you, and that you will leave anyone who attempts to trample your free spirit.
Another thing a man will find attractive is if you show him you are independent, and expect him to maintain his friendships and his hobbies, and that you will too. Show him that you are a genuine woman, not given to jealousy and pettiness - and he will see your worth.
So begin the transformation of your love life by transforming your outlook and attitude, and see just what a smart, healthy, attractive and worthwhile woman like yourself can accomplish with such a small change.
Tags: Personal Development
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